I can light up a small pinner joints instead,so why would I need booze on top of it?

The cravings must be controled, like this week they are since Tuesday night or wednesday night.

I am making decaf instead to drink something nice.

I am always praying to God an dBuddha tonight. I even thanked Jesus for him and Buddha were in hell when I visited hell beings in this house, as visions very fun and safe.

Always in the orange light. I felt like I was with my sister, exploring hell in visions.

These visions were truly truly exquisitely imaginative and awe inspiring. So vivid and kind deep down. I lived in constant fear of my mortality , daily, during that year or two however. I feel very blessed to have known such states of mind so sustainably for two years. Thank you Buddhadharma and Jesus teachings and Virgin Mary too.