Yes and I don't know why.  The morning is mellow ad mantras for precarious times are playing, hindu mantras with Deva Premal. I will go smoke a cigarette on the porch and dedicate today's merit and virtues to the enlightenment of all sentient beings.

UPDATE

I am back. I was beyond nuts about two weeks ago.

It is scary for my safety.

The lack of booze has helped a lot recently.

I dont know what else to say. I made crazy promises of millions of dollars to people dont I dont have a penny to my name.

It is all madness. I think it is triggered by my traumas from 2006-2007.