Okay, so after the initial stress and shock of having a tense man home again, all is well. he really loves me, that i know. But somehow, he is missing the boat i think. It is his deep disrespect of woman smarter than him that annoys me. Woman who are perfectly mentally stable when he is not. It makes it super hard to support him when he is so volatile and allows himself to say the rudest things. I was pretty bad myself for a few years while I was trying to figure out what it means to be mentally sane with everyone. It is a learning curve and Brian is just a bit late on me, but that is natural: he has a long life ahead of him to come to peace wheras, if I am right, I will be gone in the next couple of years. I had a sweet time reminisce about how great Alan and i had it, I had it, with Alan. But obviously I did not marry Alan for a reason. He will always remain just the truest lover, with Stefan, i ever had. And since he is NEVER violent or angry with me, it is easy and fabulous love.
The Poetry Dervish